(P.Mark)
From the album Stowaways

There is a picture in the papers
Of me cavorting with two very lovely girls
I won’t confirm it, I can’t deny it
But it’s most certainly a pack of filthy lies
Now there’s a rumor been circulating
Designed to bring me grief, to besmirch my good name
And in the court of public opinion
I’m forced to stand and refute the lies they claim

What the world can’t see
What the crowd doesn’t know
The hardship and hurt
The torments that for years
Had driven me so low
But now that’s all over
That chapter’s long since ended
And I do apologize to anyone
Who might’ve been offended

There’s a reporter on the telephone
Claims I passed millions through a Vatican bank agency
I won’t confirm it, I can’t deny it
But it’s most certainly a pack of filthy lies
Now there’s a summons in my mailbox
And to the bar I am called to testify
Calamity and scandal, laid at my doorstep
In my golden years, no less, only the devil knows why

– Chorus –

Now there is a video on the Internet
Shows me entertaining Third Reich conventioneers
I won’t confirm it, I can’t deny it
But it’s most certainly a pack of filthy lies
How can you blame me?
Am I so different?
By hook or crook we all do scrounge for bed and board
The sea is stocked with doomed and rotting fishes
Why not gaff them, and for profit pull ‘em aboard

– Chorus –